To The Manor Born
Elspeth- Elizabeth Tinkabel Smythe
Is the cutest, most innocent lambkin alive.
She comes of the purest of pedigree stock,
From the upper-class end of the wealthiest flock.
Elspeth-Elizabeth’s blue-blooded Pa
Was appropriate match for her regal Mama,
He from the line of Great Rameses VII,
She from the Twistleton-Tuppes of Dunleven .
Elspeth-Elizabeth’s grooming and poise
Marked her apart from the girls and the boys;
Showed in the tone of her elegant baa
From the Debutantes’ Lambery, Cheltenham Spa.
Elspeth-Elizabeth’s mother’s desire,
After bringing her out at the Trials in the Shire
Was to get her to move in desirable quarters
And mix in a suitable circle of daughters.
Now all of their loftiest hopes are requited,
For Elspeth-Elizabeth’s just been invited
To attend at that most elevated of matings,
As Lady Diana’s First Lady-in-Waiting.
( from ‘Bertie at the Royal Wedding’ )