Business School Song
PublishedDecember 9, 2012 CategoryBertie in Business

Business School Song


Memorandum nunc, Anate – Aquatica* celere
Est scribendum Directori venditorum hodie.

                                  (Get right in here, Miss Puddle-Duck,
                                    And take a memo, right away.
                                   Address it to the Sales Director.
                                   Move! Ain’t got the whole damn day!)

Quaere lupae cunctatorem quid obstet hunc filium,
Fax instanter est mittenda, sine faece bovium.

                                    (Ask the lazy son-of-bitches
                                    What-the-hell’s got in the way.
                                    Say I want a fax this minute,
                                    And no bull-shit now. OK?)

Benedicte, quo collapsis dividendis fugimus,
Quid sit Urbis declarandum Institutionibus.

                                     (Would he kindly make suggestions,
                                     Now the profit’s in collapse,
                                     As to where we hide, or tell these
                                     City Institution chaps?)

Cogitamus ergo sumus placebat philosophis,
Neque vero elegantis illis monetariis.

                                    (“I think, therefore I am” ’s a treasure
                                       Old philosophy enjoys,
                                       But cash provides the only pleasure
                                       For these banker fancy-boys.)

* an allusion to Jemima Puddle-Duck(Jemima Anate-Aquatica) a well-known beauty and pin-for early 20th century businessmen and business school professors.

Scored for soloist and choir.

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